Monday, March 10, 2014

...GROWN ASS MEN?
*skids in on two wheels, brakes screeching*
I made it! Have you ever had a week go completely tip-tilted all at once? Welcome to my last week. ANYWHO... Who's ready for some Grown Ass Men?


Not whiny teens, not 'troubled' twentysomethings... I'm talking about real men with real jobs, taking care of their own lives. They may have some issues, but they're confident and capable. Sound like someone you know?

Yeah, yeah... I know those angst-ridded pups can be interesting sometimes, but what real woman has time for the antics they pull in so many books? In real life, how many of us would stick with a mysoginist, superior ass? No one's got time for that! A lot of my Omnific sisters felt the same, so we came up with this tour celebrating  the REAL men in our lives (and our books). Take a look at each of these blogs, and bask in the radiance of the Grown Ass Man:

Amber Belldene, author of the Blood Vine Series
Autumn Markus, author of The Art of Appreciation
Feather Stone, author of The Guardian's Wildchild
Jennifer Lane, author of the CONduct Series
Julianna Keyes, author of Just Once
Nicki Elson, author of Divine Temptation 
Rachel Brimble, author of 16 Marsden Place

What constitutes real grown-up love? Someone who holds down a job, even when it's not fun? Maybe it's taking you seriously, as an adult. Respecting your job. Taking responsibility every day for keeping love alive. My friend Sue defines it as making coffee each and every morning, in order that the children might live another day (lol). My own definition would have to include a man (or woman) who is supportive of your accomplishments, and celebrates your successes without being threatened by them. Someone who spends time with the children they helped create without calling it 'babysitting'. And laughter. Always laughter, even during 'those' times (Have you ever noticed that schmexytimes in so many books are always DEADLY SERIOUS? How much fun is THAT? If you can't laugh with the one you're intimate with, what the heck is the point?)

So here's my question for you: how do you define love with a Grown Ass Man? Leave a comment and have a chance to win a $50 Amazon gift certificate! Go to the Omnific Publishing blog to enter.

AND...

Because I'm so late getting this info posted, Imma give you a chance to win the last signed paperback copy of THE ART OF APPRECIATION, the book about my own Grown Ass Man! Matt's a sculptor, a surfer, and supremely grown up--have a read and let me know what you think of him :)

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Now, if I can only figure out why last night I dreamed about traveling to Paris with the in-laws, and why no one wanted to see anything but a tree that had been peed behind "over 15,000 times", and why Ricky Schroeder was redecorating my house by throwing out everything and replacing it with huge tapestries... whatever I ate last night to cause that trainwreck of a dream was just WRONG...

21 comments:

  1. There's so much I like about this post, including:

    * "In real life, how many of us would stick with a mysoginist, superior ass?" Ain't nobody got time for that!

    * "My friend Sue defines it as making coffee each and every morning, in order that the children might live another day" (Ha! She sounds like a good friend.)

    * "My own definition would have to include a man (or woman) who is supportive of your accomplishments, and celebrates your successes without being threatened by them." *nods*

    * Laughter, especially during sex! So important.

    This is a great giveaway.

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  2. Grown-Ass Man? In my book he has a vision for his future and works hard to achieve his dreams. He can wear a pink shirt without it diminishing is testosterone levels. He's articulate in expressing his needs and not ashamed to admit his defeats. He admires a woman's beauty and knows his way around a woman's body. He cares. His need to please her does not arise from his ego. Her happiness is on par with a dessire to connect with her soul. That kind of man - I'd deny him nothing.

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    1. Damn, that was eloquently put Feather!

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    2. Hell yes. I've never understood the appeal of a Peter Pan. Give me a real, grown up man, who has a handle on his own life.

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  3. A Grown-Ass Man, in my opinion, needs to be comfortable in his own skin. He needs to be confidant in his opinions and actions and not worry about what others may think. He needs to be able to own his own mistakes and put to right what he may have wronged and not be afraid of showing his emotions. He'd love deeply and fiercely, not only his chosen partner, but his whole family. The people in his life would know they could go to him for anything and he'd try to do everything he could because he cares. He'd be hard-working and trustworthy. A Grown-Ass Man is my kind of man.

    Thank you so much for the post and giveaway! I'd love the chance to read your book, so fingers crossed for luck. :-)

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    1. Very, very eloquent, and exactly what I'd want.

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  4. The children have survived another day he made coffee just a he does everyday. Grown up love is not the fluttery rollercoaster feeling of first love or new love that is exciting but it thrill is uncertain and dangerous . It is uncertain because it is not tested it is not something that can be counted on. The trust that is there in real love beats out the butterflies and flush of new love. I'll take my comfy slipper love over stilettos any day. When you hear the vows they are pretty version of this: he loves me when Im crabby and look like shit. I love him when he is being is stubborn ass . He shows me love in many little ways he goes to work everyday he buys me seeds. I show him my love by making home comfortable and telling him when he is being a stupid ass. Real love is jobs and kids and bills and not having enough money but still being able to laugh and smile and cry together. He is not a body builder billionaire and I am too damn good looking to be a book heroine !

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    1. Hallelujah! Sing it, Sue! 'First love' ain't no love at all--it's attraction. To love someone, you have to trust them, and to trust them, you have to KNOW them.

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  5. Hey, let me know what you ate because that sounds like a FUN dream!

    Grown up love to me is when two people, though they may often disagree, function primarily as a team. For example the "babysitting" thing -- ugh! It drives me insane when a father looks at spending time with his own kids as a chore, or like he's somehow doing the mom a favor. That is not teamwork.

    Very fun post, Autumn! Thanks so much for instigating this event and coming up with such a kick-ass name for it!

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    1. Well, I'm known for my ladylike vocabulary ;) Does anyone else get all mushy watching a guy truly enjoy their kids? It's CRAZY attractive! I'd take that over a 'six-pack' any day.

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  6. Love with a grown ass man: Not needing to spend every waking moment together because we are not insecure. Talking and ARGUING, because we're separate people and have different opinions about things. Being able to appreciate those differences and also appreciate the things we do have in common. Recognizing when you're wrong and saying "I'm sorry."

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    1. Yes, yes yes! Years ago, a mutual friend with whom I worked hijacked a phone convo I was having with The Man to arrange a 'guys' night'. Another (guy) friend who was sitting nearby remarked that my BH was lucky that I 'let' him make such plans. How nuts was that?! Grown ups shouldn't be controlling each other--it's about respect for each other as individuals. That's another thing I don't get about some books--sighing over someone who's a bossypants. Not for this girl!

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  7. Love with a Grown-Ass man boils down to just one thing for me: Truth in advertising. No game playing, no role playing, no faking the funk until you get it right, Truth in every intention and action.

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  8. A grown-ass man for me, is comfortable with who he is and doesn't have to prove his worthiness to anyone.

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    1. Hallelujah! Let's hear it for real men--confidence is much sexier than general neediness :)

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  9. I laughed at the coffee situation. A man who understands caffeine is fundamental to the survival of the species is clearly one worth keeping.

    A grown-ass man for me is someone who likes to talk and laugh about the good stuff, the boring stuff, and everything in between. Someone who likes and accepts me just the way I am, who can see me first thing in the morning and still want to give me a cuddle. If a man can't accept me at my worst, he doesn't deserve me at my best!

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    1. EXACTLY. I like a quote from Charlie Chaplin: “Your naked body should only belong to those who fall in love with your naked soul.”

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  10. Love with a grown ass man - I'm gonna describe it from personal experience, because my dude is a total GAM. Love when we were younger was all about dates and parties and holidays and tonsil hockey...now it's watching him with our kids (which I swear makes me fall more in love with him), it's getting that rare-as-a-jackalope date night and laughing until we cry. It's missing him when he's working ridiculous hours to support our family, and then he comes home and does the dishes while I'm trying to feed the kids before he even takes his work clothes off. And I don't even have to ask. It's flowers that he brings home, just because he was thinking of me, and sweet surprise voice mails when I don't pick up the phone. It's knowing that I'm enough for him. Grown up shit. It's awesome.

    Love your post, Autumn!

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    1. YES. That's a GAM! I have one, too--isn't it GREAT?!

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